As graduation approaches
Aaron Porter
Issue date: 11/24/08 Section: Opinion
As I wrote the date today, I realized that we are almost done with the first semester, and my time left at Clarkson has been reduced to a meager one semester. It also occurred to me that this will be the first time in my life that there won't be that "next year" to look forward to unless I decide to pursue a graduate degree. This means that I only have one semester to figure out what to do after I graduate unless I want to go back home and live in my parent's basement. As of right now, I have no idea what I want to do with my life and each assignment I complete brings me one step closer to being a Clarkson Alumni and not a Clarkson student. This thought looms over my head as I do my best to make it through the rest of my undergraduate career. The idea of graduating in May is exciting, but at the same time I'm worried about what will happen once I get my diploma and stroll off into the real world.
As I look around, it often seems that nobody else is so undecided. Most people appear to know what they want to do and have a plan for how they want their life to turn out after college.
Many of my friends are going to graduate school or are actively seeking jobs in their respective fields. As for me, I haven't filled out a single application to any graduate school nor have I gone to any career fairs. Some people might construe this as laziness, but I would argue that my course of no action is due partly to a fear of failure in whatever I choose to pursue. I am afraid that I might not be knowledgeable enough in my subject area to excel in my job or at graduate school. I am worried about what expectations companies or graduate schools will have of me and whether I am intelligent enough to meet them. I think part of the reason I am so worried is because I don't feel as though I am particularly talented when it comes to my major. However, I am already three and a half years into it; no turning back now.
It often seems like I am the only person who worries about these types of things. I feel as though most of the people I know have no fears about being able to succeed in their future endeavors. What I would like to know is where do they get all this confidence? Is it instilled upon them by their parents, co-workers, and friends, or is it just self-confidence? Perhaps their experiences in the working world, in the form of internships and the like, have shown them that they have what they need to succeed. As for me, I don't feel like I have what I need to succeed, but I guess only time will tell.
As I look around, it often seems that nobody else is so undecided. Most people appear to know what they want to do and have a plan for how they want their life to turn out after college.
Many of my friends are going to graduate school or are actively seeking jobs in their respective fields. As for me, I haven't filled out a single application to any graduate school nor have I gone to any career fairs. Some people might construe this as laziness, but I would argue that my course of no action is due partly to a fear of failure in whatever I choose to pursue. I am afraid that I might not be knowledgeable enough in my subject area to excel in my job or at graduate school. I am worried about what expectations companies or graduate schools will have of me and whether I am intelligent enough to meet them. I think part of the reason I am so worried is because I don't feel as though I am particularly talented when it comes to my major. However, I am already three and a half years into it; no turning back now.
It often seems like I am the only person who worries about these types of things. I feel as though most of the people I know have no fears about being able to succeed in their future endeavors. What I would like to know is where do they get all this confidence? Is it instilled upon them by their parents, co-workers, and friends, or is it just self-confidence? Perhaps their experiences in the working world, in the form of internships and the like, have shown them that they have what they need to succeed. As for me, I don't feel like I have what I need to succeed, but I guess only time will tell.
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